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The Bunker/Episodes/Episode 41: Teh Cores
YAY! Part 1 Curiosity Core: Who are you? What is that? Wheatley: Weren't you incinerated in the first Portal game? (Fourth wall cracks) Mochlum: Your entire life is a mathmatical error. I am about to fix it. GLaDOS: Not again! You monster! Shut up! Mochlum: UMAD! Tornadospeed: MADNESS? THIS IS SPARTA! sparta remix video here Fact Core: Sparta is a Greek city. Tornadospeed: Adventure Core: QUICK, WHAT'S THE SITUATION? Space Core: SPAAAAAAAAAACE! Mochlum: You are from space? I have a friend in space! He in danger! WE MUST HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP THEM! Space Core: We're going to space? We are!? OMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGODOMAIGOD!!!! Wheatley: Ugh. Mochlum: They left MAGICAL CLUES of where they are in 3 different spots! They are.... the Death Star, the Dusty Dune Galaxy, and Aperture Science labs! WEEEEEEE! LET'S GO! A Brief Construction Montage (Everyone builds a rocket and gathers supplies) Mochlum: WE FINISHED! NOW LET'S GO TO SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE, SPAAAAAAAAAAAAACE CORES! Tornadospeed: WHAT HE SAID (Rocket blasts off) The Death Star Space Core: I'M IN SPAAACE!!! Tornadospeed: Yes, yes you are. WHERE TO FIRST, CAPTAIN MOCHLUM? Mochlum: THE DEATH STAR! IN PRINCESS LEIA'S CELL! (at the Death Star) Stormtrooper: WHO ARE YOU? Mochlum: WE are.... um.... SHPOCK! Stormtrooper: NOOOO ITS THE COMPETITION GET THEM! Mochum: Wooooooooops. Space Core: HURRY INTO THE DEATH STAR! (everyone runs in) Princess Leia: I hope somebody saves me! Mochlum: (runs in) Space Core: WHERE IS THE CLUE? Stormtrooper: HAULT! WHO ARE YOU? Anger Core: BLAUALKGSUALGUSADGKJDADJKDBALBKJALLLLUAUABULBAUABLAUG (continues growling) Stormtrooper: Uh... Princess Leia: Aren't you here to rescue me? Space Core: FOUND THE CLUE1 Princess Leia: No? T_T Mochlum: YEP! TROLOLO! (everyone leaves) Mochlum: The clue is... Space Core: (reads) I AM AT A TACO PLACE, WHERE THE EATERS HAVE BIG FACES! Mochlum; It is probably- Space Core: DON'T SAY, IT WILL SPOIL THE END OF THE EPISODE! Mochlum: NEXT PLACE IS THE DUSTY DUNE GALAXY! (everyone gets in the ship and flys away) Dusty Dune Galaxy Mochlum: TIME FOR WHAT CHUGGACONROY CALLS "Extremely monotonous levels". Space Core: WHERE IS TEH CLUE??????????????????? Mochlum: (sinks in sand 20 times) I FOUND ONE! IT SAYS.... It is often combined with KFC, and don't stop here if you want to pee. Mochlum; It still probably is... Space Core: STOP TEH SPOILERS!!!! WHERE IS TEH NEXT CLUE? Mochlum: Aperture Labs... Space Core: OOOOKAAAAAY! Adventure Core: Really? That was quick! (sinks in quicksand) (everyone gets in the ship) Aperture Science Laboratories Logic Core: One 18.25 ounce package Chocolate Cake Mix. Tornadospeed: Yes, I think we established that. (ship lands) Tornadospeed: Everyone get a portal gun to help us navigate! Excluding the cores, who can't hold them. Mochlum: 8D (puts the Fact Core in an infinite loop) Tornadospeed: LETS GOOO! Wheatley: But she'll see us if we go through the chambers! Tornadospeed: Good point. EVERYONE UP THIS DELIVERY VENT! (climbs into it) (Everyone climbs into it) Curiosity Core: WEEEEEEEEEE! (Vent Breaks) (Everyone falls out onto a dark catwalk) Adventure Core: Aww great. Wheatley: (turns on flashlight) They told me that if I ever used this flashlight, I would die! Why would they give me this stuff if they didn't want me to use them? I mean seriously! Mochlum: Well I can use it. (uses it) I FOUND THE FINAL CLUE! GLaDOS: (grabs clue with mechanical arm) I'LL TAKE THAT. Everyone: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Tornadospeed: (uses portals to get to GLaDOS' chamber) GLaDOS: BWAHAHA, YOU'LL NEVER GET THIS... WHATEVER IT IS! Mochlum: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS??? GLaDOS: Well duh. I'm evil. NOW YOU ALL MUST PERISH! Turrets: (shoots at everyone) Mochlum: (dodges bullets... in a cliched Matrix style) Tornadospeed: (uses portals to redirect bullets back to the turrets) Turrets: Ouch... no hard feelings... I don't blame you... (dies) GLaDOS: I'm not finished with you yet. (summons rocket sentrys) Rocket Sentrys: (locks on to us and fires rockets) Space Core: EVERYBODY RUN! (Everyone runs) Wheatley: I HAVE AN IDEA! SEND ME INTO AN INFINITE LOOP! Tornadospeed: (puts Wheatley into an infinite loop) Wheatley: NOW SHOOT THE ORANGE PORTAL OVER THERE! Tornadospeed: (does so) (Wheatley flys out the orange portal and lands on a button) GLaDOS: NO! WHAT ARE YOU doooiiiinnnngg. (shuts down) Rocket Sentrys: (shuts down) Everyone: YAY! Mochlum: Now where's that clue... Ah, there ya are! (takes clue) Clue: I am where the bell rings- Mochlum: It must be- Fact Core: STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS TACO BELL! Mochlum: THAT IS WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY! Space Core: NO! Wheatley: So Mochlum's friend is at Taco Bell? Here is a cake portkey to Taco Bell! Mochlum: (takes it) IT'S A LIE! IT TOOK ME TO KFC! And it tastes pretty good. Adventure Core: Was it by a Taco Bell? Mochlum: Well of course- Space Core: IDIOT! (everyone takes cake portkey to KFC by Taco Bell) Meap: YOU SAVED ME FROM THIS HORRIBLE TACO PLACE! Mochlum: YOUR WELCOME! Space Core: So is this episode over? Mochlum: I guess. This was the best adventure ever. Space Core: I highly doubt that. TEH ENDZ! Category:Random Works! Category:The Bunker Category:The Bunker Episodes Category:Portal